Is Healing the Goal?

So, I wrote a post the other day about how I'm not sure that healing should be the first thing on a Christian's mind when struggling with illness. I've said before that I want this time in my life to be a time of refining in my Christian walk and that's still true but I also very much want to be healed. I've struggled with what I wrote because I seem to waffle between being strong and really focusing on God and whatever His will is for me in this time and times of just really crying out for relief and answers. I shared this with a younger but very wise friend the other day and she reminded me that the two aren't mutually exclusive. Even Jesus asked God to deliver Him from the fate that He knew awaited Him, but His ultimate prayer was that He would submit to God's will and not His own. So, with that I am going to share what I wrote the other day. Perhaps we can get a dialog going about how others see this and it will be an encouragement to those who need it. By the way, I'm not saying that anyone who is sick should not be taking care of their health or seeking treatment if that is how God is leading, just that our focus needs to stay on God and not our circumstances. Here goes: For Christians, should healing be the goal? I've been thinking about this quite a bit lately. I'm reading through the Bible with the plan suggested by Bible Gateway. The New Testament readings have taken me through the books of Hebrews, James and I Peter lately. Those books all contain verses that encourage us to see our trials as reason for rejoicing. Hebrews 12:5-11 speaks of God disciplining His children. He tells us not to lose heart because He disciplines those that He loves. It compares His discipline of us to that of an earthly father with his child. Verses 10-11 say, "10 They disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness. 11 No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." Another translation calls the result "the peaceful fruit of righteousness." Who doesn't want that in their lives? James chapter 1 verses 2-4 say, "2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." Verse 12 says, "12 Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him." I Peter 1:3-7 speak of the living hope that we have, by God's mercy, through the resurrection of Jesus. Verses 6 and 7 say, "6 In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7 These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed."When I first suspected that I had cancer 5 years ago, I sat down intending to pray that the results would not be cancer. The words that came out of my mouth, however, were "Thy will be done." I had been asking God to change me and I suspected that this would be part of the process. I'm not saying that God caused the cancer but that He allowed it to strengthen my faith and perseverance. At the time of my initial diagnosis it was the cry of my heart that the changes I had been asking for would come through this trial. I wanted to be a better wife and mom and be more intentional about teaching my kids about following God. For a while that happened, but as I began to feel healthier some of our old habits crept back in and the focus became more on eradicating the cancer so I could get on with my life. Through this most recent trial of pain and weakness there have, of course, been times of intense crying out to God for healing. There came a point a couple weeks ago, however, that I just felt I needed to praise God in the midst of the storm and stop begging God for healing and clamoring for ways to help Him out with it. I still very much desire to be healed but not at the expense of the refining process that has God in the fire with me. Isaiah 43 1b-2 “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;I have summoned you by name; you are mine.2 When you pass through the waters,I will be with you;and when you pass through the rivers,they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned;the flames will not set you ablaze." God's word never promises us a life without trials, but over and over again He promises to be with us no matter what we face. I know there are those who believe and teach that any Christian who has enough faith will be healed by God. I would like to believe that but I don't think it is entirely supported by Scripture. I also know of some giants of the faith who have not been healed but God has greatly used them in His Kingdom. One example of this is Joni Eareckson Tada. Joni was paralyzed in a diving accident many years ago. Her disability has spawned a ministry to folks with disabilities all over the world. She also speaks and is a great encouragement to many I am sure. I am always amazed at her sweet spirit after all that she has been through in her life. I believe it is the result of knowing God's presence in her moments and days. I believe the sense of God's presence comes out of a keen awareness of her need. Trials tend to clear away extraneous issues and bring into sharp focus what is really important. I remember praying, "I want to want what You want for me" in a growth group meeting a couple years ago.I'm not always at the place where I already want what He wants, but it truly is the desire of my heart to get there.